It's one of those nights that writing is just not coming to me. Every so often I glance out the window in desperation. It was sunny a little while ago. It's 9:26 p.m. now. I've been at this a long while. Here I sit, on and off, waiting for the magic lightening bolt of creativity to conjure up an entertaining tale. I'd even be fine with a heartwarming memory or a short witty poem. But nothing. It's as if I never lived a day in my life or have lost my memory. I sit. I lay on the floor. I do a few stretches... 7 modified pushups... watch the new Beyonce music video... eat a Greek yogurt... start a load of laundry...
The cursor keeps blinking at me.
Blink. Blink. Blink.
Each time a jeering reminder that I haven't yet written a word.
Blink. Blink.
"WHAT DO YOU WANT!?" I yell at the screen. "I've got NOTHING for you today."
I wonder if professional authors ever get this way. Imagine "writer" being your full-time job. On a day when you can't "do your job," you do everything BUT your job. Bathe dog.. walk around the yard a few times in your socks... research how to brew kombucha... color code the books on the bookshelf into a rainbow pattern... nap. Being a teacher, I don't get to do that. I can't go to my job, and then decide I'm not able to perform that day. What an odd concept. What other jobs do you get away with that? Painter, maybe? What else? Designer? Blink. Blink. I wonder what is the longest amount of time a writer had WRITER'S BLOCK without giving up on their career?
Teacher's block. Surgeon's block. Firefighter's block. Doesn't seem to fit.
I imagine a building in mid burn-down, (everyone's safe, don't worry) and a firefighter standing there with a dripping hose. Frozen. Blink, blinking like a deer in the headlights.
"Sorry guys, I can't today. I have firefighter's block." Drip. Drip. Drip.
"That's alright, Jim! Go home, eat a Greek yogurt, watch the new Beyonce music video. You'll be back at it tomorrow!"
Megan,
ReplyDeleteThis is a great piece. I think that everyone who has ever had to write has felt this way. Have you shared this with your students? I think it would be great for them to hear a piece you wrote about the struggles writing can bring at times.
I love how you summed up with the greek yogurt and Beyonce reference again.
Nice job!
-Megan T.
Megan,
ReplyDeleteWhat a fun writing! I started laughing to myself because it's so true! Firefighters can't just go home and eat yogurt, but it's a real issue for Writers. I love your perspective in this piece. I've never thought about it this way. I love that while I read, I felt like I was in your head, hearing your thoughts as you struggled to come up with something. I have often looked at a piece of paper and found I had nothing to say for the day. So I put my journal away and that was it. But you're right, when writing is your job, you can't just put it away for the day.
My friend writes and I wonder how it must feel to never really put work away. We can make an escape if we need to from our jobs, but as a writer, if she has an amazing idea at 3:00 in the morning, she was to write it down no matter how long it keeps her up.
Again, I love your perspective and I appreciate how you presented it. I could definitely relate. Thanks for sharing!
Amy
Megan,
ReplyDeleteI can definitely relate to this piece since 40% of my job is research and writing. Writing is crazy hard work (so is teaching). I agree with Megan T about sharing this with your students--many will be able to connect and you will be sharing how hard writing is for you sometimes (something they probably can't imagine).
I especially like how you played with bold letters and repeating words. These are great! You might actually want to repeat the first stanza beginning with "The cursor..." again possibly between the last two paragraphs.
Yes, professional writers feel this often. The children's authors I have met struggle with everything you describe. deanna